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This article was published on July 16, 2021

The internet’s best comment section is on a shark tracker app

Don't shoot me, I'm just the messenger

The internet’s best comment section is on a shark tracker app
Callum Booth
Story by

Callum Booth

Editor of Plugged by TNW

Callum is an Englishman in Amsterdam, but not in the way you're thinking. He's the Editor of Plugged, TNW's consumer tech vertical. He w Callum is an Englishman in Amsterdam, but not in the way you're thinking. He's the Editor of Plugged, TNW's consumer tech vertical. He writes about gear, gadgets, and apps — with a particular focus on Apple — and also makes the occasional odd video. Basically, he's halfway between an abrasive gadget nerd and thinky art boy.

Pure joy often strikes you in the most unexpected places. Take this morning, for example. I woke after an awful night’s sleep, expecting a terrible day, and instead I was met with OCEARCH, a shark tracker app.

Wonder what I’m talking about it? Well, OCEARCH is an organization dedicated to supporting marine life. One of the things it does to try and achieve this is to track marine life across the globe.

Mainly, it’s a shark tracker, but OCEARCH also keeps an eye on other sea animals, including dolphins and turtles. You can go and have a look at the web app here.

Thing is, this isn’t where its true joy lies. That’s on the mobile app, which has been blowing up on Twitter.

Here’s a little public service announcement: go and download the OCEARCH shark tracking app now. It’s terrific. Specifically, because the comments are absolute gold.

Please, let me show you. Here’s the closest sea turtle to me in Northern Europe right now, the gorgeous Thalia:

Thalia OCEARCH shark tracking app
CUTIE PATOOTIE.

And, pals, feast upon the positivity:

thalia shark tracking app

This isn’t just reserved for sea turtles though. How about we check in with a cheeky chappy called Brunswick, an actual shark?

brunswick shark tracker app
I’D DIE FOR YOU, BRUNSWICK.

What will the deluge of commentators on the shark tracking app say about the bite-y boy? Will they be scared? Anxious? Or maybe they’ll be wonderfully supportive and continue to spread joy, one sea creature at a time?

brunswich OCEARCH shark tracker app

Finally — which is a crying shame because I could do this all day — I hunted through OCEARCH for something a little different. And what did I find? A swordfish who goes by the name Anthony:

anthony OCEARCH
SHINE ON.

But Anthony is a special case, check out their gender:

anthony OCEARCH gender

How would the shark tracking app community react? Well… do you even need to ask that question?

 

anthony non binary swordfish
SLAY, ANTHONY!

Honestly, I could go on all day. I’ve already spent a good hour of my Friday scrolling through a range of different animals and just soaking up the joy in the comments. This is what I needed today.

Yes, there is a slight dark side in that a fair number of these lovely creatures haven’t been tracked in a few years, meaning they may have passed — but let’s not let details get in the way of a good time.

The OCEARCH shark tracking app‘s comment sections is one of the purest things on the internet right now, and that’s even after The French Dispatch fashion meme.

So, go right ahead and download the OCEARCH shark tracker app. But be nice. Be supportive. There’s enough shit in this world without bringing it there.

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